Cops is the old Reno 911

Just when you think your TV watching habits could not become any more embarrassing than they already are.... I have now had to face a new TV addiction that I can’t explain or understand. Last night, about 12:45, it occurred to me that I was unable to fall asleep until I had watched the 12:30 RE-RUN OF COPS!!!

For the last 3 weeks I have been staying up most nights to watch, but it wasn’t until last night that I realized my day was not complete without it. What has happened in my life that I am unable to fall asleep without 30 minutes of bad hair, tank tops and crazy people from the early ‘90’s?

So, after I realized I had a problem last night, I tried to analyze just what it was about the show that was so good. It could be the time of night, but the episodes are so incredibly funny. I don’t remember watching them in the early ‘90’s and laughing as hard as I do now. In fact, I think they may have scared me a little bit. I didn’t see that kind of crime on the “hard streets” of Bountiful. All I can figure is that my love for Reno 911 made this change. After a few episodes of COPS, you realize that although the cops themselves are crazy exaggerated, the actual suspects and arrests are not. I mean, I have never seen a giant milkshake on COPS, but there is some REALLY GOOD material in there. How is this show not on more?!

Highlights of the episodes I have watched:

• An old lady with a baseball bat going after two men that are trying to get her son. Wow. Not one of these three individuals was making any sense.
• A man set fire to his friend’s garage while working on his car. It sounds innocent enough, but the man then went into some sort of a freak out, that made mine nervous breakdown on Friday look like nothing! He hit his head against a lawn chair over and over while saying “asinine” repeatedly.
• Some guy had been cut really bad in the hand in a fight, but was actually not in trouble himself, would not let the paramedics help him. He ran around and fought them with blood going everywhere. They finally cuffed him and shoved him in the stretcher…I swear, it took about 5 guys.
• They found a house they called a “huffing house” that had over 30 paint cans, paint thinner…etc…laying around. There was a guy face down on the floor and the cops couldn’t take the smell. One day, I believe they will find me in a pile of dry erase markers….
• This was perhaps my favorite…there was a naked woman that they wanted her to put her clothes on, but she wouldn’t go get them from the other room. Some cop came across the room with her bra on the end of his night stick…and he was still holding it out like he could have gotten a disease. I was still laughing about that the next day.

So there, now everyone knows why I am so tired at work all day. I must stop this madness and go to bed like a normal person. I also must go see the Reno 911 movie.