the facts about electricity

The orange extension cord investigation is still going on. I am even more confused now then I was when this began. I noticed that his minivan has nothing but front seats…I thought that might be strange. The thing is, now, no matter how nice the “Pirate” is; I am going to be creeped out.

Here are the facts that I know:

1. The orange extension cord comes and goes. It appears that when he is home, it is plugged in. When he is not home, it is missing.
2. Last night after dark, while the cord was plugged in, I saw no obvious lights through the window, and could hear no sounds from a TV. I will point out, that for the almost year I have lived next to this guy, I don’t think I have ever heard a TV.
3. There are 10 electrical outlets in the apartments. That is 20 items that can be plugged in…and more should you so desire to use extension cords.
4. I have never actually seen, or heard the neighbor plugging in this extension cord…I can only point out that it goes under his door.

cause for concern?

My mother is that snoopy neighbor that every neighborhood has. She knows the comings and goings of all her neighbors, and will point out if a “strange” car has been parked for longer than she believes it should. She notices who comes home at 3:00am, and she is not afraid to mention it to the homeowner. As far as I can remember back, she has always been this way. I have tried my hardest not to become that person…and I feel like I have done okay. Living in an apartment complex is a “snoopy neighbor’s” dream. I may need my mom’s help with the next door neighbor.

I call him “the Pirate”. He is a very nice man, obviously, looks like a pirate. He has quite a bit of stuff on his balcony, and spends a lot of time “working” on his minivan in the parking lot. I believe he lives alone, but am not sure…he is actually very, very quiet. I only hear him when he comes home late at night, about the time I am settling in to watch COPS. My neighbor downstairs has filled me in on what she knows about him. She sad he works with his Mom and that he works at night and sleeps in the day. She also mentioned that he is really into crafts. Which explains the toll painted signs on his door, and wooden birdhouse arrangements next to his door.

He and I live at the top of the stairs, and we are the only two apartments there. He has to walk past my door, to get to his. This morning I noticed that he had plugged a big orange extension cord into the outdoor plug right by my front door. The cable then ran under my doormat, between our apartments and then right into his apartment with the door shut over it. I stared for several minutes trying to figure out what the hell could be going on. I went back into mine to count outlets. There are plenty in there. Here are the questions I know have:

• How many appliances could he have plugged in, that he can’t possibly use one of his own outlets?
• What could be so important to plug in that he has to run an extension cord outside?
• How dangerous would it be if I went ahead and unplugged it tonight when I get home?
• Am I paying for this electricity he is using?
• Should I be concerned?
• Where is my mom when I need her most?

Cops is the old Reno 911

Just when you think your TV watching habits could not become any more embarrassing than they already are.... I have now had to face a new TV addiction that I can’t explain or understand. Last night, about 12:45, it occurred to me that I was unable to fall asleep until I had watched the 12:30 RE-RUN OF COPS!!!

For the last 3 weeks I have been staying up most nights to watch, but it wasn’t until last night that I realized my day was not complete without it. What has happened in my life that I am unable to fall asleep without 30 minutes of bad hair, tank tops and crazy people from the early ‘90’s?

So, after I realized I had a problem last night, I tried to analyze just what it was about the show that was so good. It could be the time of night, but the episodes are so incredibly funny. I don’t remember watching them in the early ‘90’s and laughing as hard as I do now. In fact, I think they may have scared me a little bit. I didn’t see that kind of crime on the “hard streets” of Bountiful. All I can figure is that my love for Reno 911 made this change. After a few episodes of COPS, you realize that although the cops themselves are crazy exaggerated, the actual suspects and arrests are not. I mean, I have never seen a giant milkshake on COPS, but there is some REALLY GOOD material in there. How is this show not on more?!

Highlights of the episodes I have watched:

• An old lady with a baseball bat going after two men that are trying to get her son. Wow. Not one of these three individuals was making any sense.
• A man set fire to his friend’s garage while working on his car. It sounds innocent enough, but the man then went into some sort of a freak out, that made mine nervous breakdown on Friday look like nothing! He hit his head against a lawn chair over and over while saying “asinine” repeatedly.
• Some guy had been cut really bad in the hand in a fight, but was actually not in trouble himself, would not let the paramedics help him. He ran around and fought them with blood going everywhere. They finally cuffed him and shoved him in the stretcher…I swear, it took about 5 guys.
• They found a house they called a “huffing house” that had over 30 paint cans, paint thinner…etc…laying around. There was a guy face down on the floor and the cops couldn’t take the smell. One day, I believe they will find me in a pile of dry erase markers….
• This was perhaps my favorite…there was a naked woman that they wanted her to put her clothes on, but she wouldn’t go get them from the other room. Some cop came across the room with her bra on the end of his night stick…and he was still holding it out like he could have gotten a disease. I was still laughing about that the next day.

So there, now everyone knows why I am so tired at work all day. I must stop this madness and go to bed like a normal person. I also must go see the Reno 911 movie.

finally....

It took me more than awhile to get around to discussing my vacation. Although there are many highlights including Midnight Chocolate Buffet's, falling asleep during a comedian, and trudging through pouring rain to see the Panda's. All in all, it was good times.

Before:









After: